Advice for first-time managers, from leaders who’ve been there

Getting promoted to your first role in management can be exciting: It’s a huge milestone for your career, and you’re probably eager to jump in.

But if you’re new to leadership entirely, it’s worth taking a beat to learn from others who’ve been in your shoes. Generations of first-time managers have made mistakes and learned lessons that they can pass on to you, which just might make your life as a new leader a bit easier.

Here are 29 pieces of advice for first-time managers from management experts and leadership coaches who have been there.

Advice on humility

Don’t pretend to know it all: “It takes confidence to be in front of a team and lead them. But confidence doesn’t mean you know it all. Courage is demonstrated when you say ‘I don’t know,’ or ‘I’ll find out.’ Courageous leadership is being willing to get in the trenches and not always having the ‘right’ answer but being willing to work together to figure it out.” — Sharon Justice, Founding Director, Justice Leadership

Remember that it’s okay to make mistakes: “New leaders are learning. They’re going to make mistakes, and that’s okay. New leaders sometimes get caught up in thinking they need to be perfect. That puts unnecessary pressure on them individually and their teams. It doesn’t set a good role model.” — Jennifer Recla, Leadership Coach and Trainer, Recla Coaching & Consulting

Don’t try to be a hero: “[New managers] feel pressured, so they try to jump in and try to solve every problem their team brings them. In turn, what this does is create a dependency that slows the team’s growth and turns the manager into a huge bottleneck. The key is to start coaching the team to solve their own problems.” — Leury Pichardo, Senior Director of Digital Marketing and PR, Digital Ceuticals

Don’t think you need to be accessible 24/7: “If you work all hours, you will burn out. Setting healthy boundaries from the beginning is the best way to show up as a leader for others.” — Jennifer Recla, Leadership Coach and Trainer, Recla Coaching & Consulting

Prioritize self-care: “To be resilient and successful, ‘me time’ is not a luxury/pampering, it’s maintenance! Respecting my time on the calendar [and] taking myself as seriously as I take my most important clients is the least I can do for self-care, because if I’m not at my peak performance, I’m not going to be useful to anyone else either.” — Paige Arnof-Fenn, Founder and CEO, Mavens & Moguls

Ask for guidance when you need it: “It is natural to encounter new experiences when you are new at anything. As soon as you learn of your promotion, start assembling a team of mentors and advisors on various topics. Read management books. Watch video tips and be prepared to keep learning.” — Nance Schick, Chief Resolution Officer, Third Ear Conflict Resolution 

Advice on managing relationships

Make sure to hold your team accountable: “We all want to be liked, both in general and as managers. We resist holding team members accountable often because we don’t want to be mean. However, there is a big difference between being ‘nice’ and being ‘kind.’ Nice managers applaud everyone and never say a mean word, even if you mess up. Kind managers hold people to high standards and help them grow and achieve through coaching and accountability.” — Michelle Rakshys, Vice President of Learning and Development, Cadence Leadership + Communication

Don’t try to be friends with everyone you supervise: “Admittedly, I made this mistake, too, many times. It’s not impossible to maintain a personal relationship with someone you supervise, but there has to be clear, mutual agreements regarding expectations at work and outside of it.” — Nance Schick, Chief Resolution Officer, Third Ear Conflict Resolution 

Maintain healthy boundaries: “As a new manager, navigating friendships at work can be tough. How much is the right amount of sharing? Do you say yes to drinks after work? Maintaining professionalism while building a rapport with direct reports usually means being friendly, but not close friends. If you don’t maintain healthy boundaries, you could end up in difficult situations where you need to choose between what’s right for your friendship or your job. Of course, if you ever leave to pursue a different role, you can always seek a closer friendship then.” — Lisa Jaycox, Owner, Lisa Jaycox Consulting

Build one-on-one relationships within your team: “Prioritize meaningful 1:1s to understand each person: their experience, their strengths, their passions, their energizers, what drains them, and what drives them. Think holistically, operate inclusively, and create space for them to grow where they want to grow.” — Lucy Kent, Solutions Director, Alchemist Learning and Development

Don’t view your direct reports as a distraction from “real work:” “Great managers know that they’re there to support and serve their direct reports. Don’t apply for a manager promotion if you aren’t ready to welcome and embrace the emotional commitment that comes with leading a team. Leadership is a privilege, not a distraction.” — Erika Migliaccio, Founder and Principal Consultant, Upstream HR Strategies 

Don’t focus on only certain colleagues: “It’s so easy as a new leader to only want to focus on those people who we think are important and can advance our careers. It’s a danger when we don’t value the secretary and the janitor and all the other people that support the work that we do. These people can be instrumental in your work because oftentimes they see and hear things that you don’t – don’t dismiss anyone. Treat people with dignity and respect, regardless of their title and position. Learn your staff beyond just knowing their names and duties. Build not just on your team but across teams, departments, and leaders. Creating an ecosystem of support is crucial!” — Froswa Booker-Drew, CEO, Soulstice Consultancy

Advice on control and delegation

Try to collaborate with (rather than control) others: “Many new managers think they are supposed to act tough and use their titles as weapons to force people to do what they want them to. It’s typically easier and more sustainable to educate them on the reasons something needs to be done and align those reasons with the worker’s personal interests.” — Nance Schick, Chief Resolution Officer, Third Ear Conflict Resolution 

Don’t forget to listen to your team: “Too often, leaders want to demonstrate their control and authority. It’s important as a new leader to be willing to listen and ask questions because you don’t know everything.” — Froswa Booker-Drew, CEO, Soulstice Consultancy

Delegate early and often: “[Failing to delegate] keeps new managers overwhelmed with too much on their plate and robs their teams of opportunities to grow their own skills. I recommend setting up systems to support building this habit: A weekly task in your system or part of your planning checklist that asks, ‘What could I delegate this week?’ to keep it top of mind.” — Jessica Eastman Stewart, Author and Workshop Facilitator

Spend more time leading than doing: “If you spend too much time doing individual contributor work, you won’t have time to strategize, lead, or learn. Delegate, empower, have regular one-on-one meetings, utilize metrics, and create operating rhythms to stay connected to your team’s work, without being in all the details, all the time.” — Erika Migliaccio, Founder and Principal Consultant, Upstream HR Strategies 

Don’t always fix others’ mistakes: “When you fix someone else’s mistake, you take away their opportunity to learn. Turn a mistake into a productive failure by fixing it together. Then, have an open and honest coaching conversation about what to do differently next time.” — Erika Migliaccio, Founder and Principal Consultant, Upstream HR Strategies 

Don’t micro-manage every last detail: “You may be tempted to involve yourself in every detail, every decision, and every meeting. Stop! That’s a sure-fire way to demotivate and disempower your employees. Your job is to clear the way and support your team so they can do their best work.” — Minette Norman, Founder and Principal, Minette Norman Consulting LLC

Advice on changes and transitions

Don’t make too many immediate changes: “First-time managers feel a lot of pressure to have immediate impact. As a result, they may be quick to start pointing out everything that is ‘wrong’ versus taking the time to absorb. Some changes may have short-term value, but at the expense of missing out on a potential better change and the risk of losing trust with your team. Instead, new managers should do a 90-day observation and listening tour, and don’t forget to focus on what is going really well.” — Mel Plett, Co-founder/Co-host, Your Work Friends

Recognize the power dynamic shift: “New managers promoted within an organization don’t always recognize that, with their promotion, the power dynamics between them and their peers and teammates may have shifted. They may have peers that now report to them as well as being a new leader with new direct reports, which requires a change in how they show up professionally and socially. As a result of not recognizing the shift, they may avoid tough calls or conversations because they want to be liked, compromising trust and accountability. The best thing they can do is recognize this shift and reset boundaries. Being trusted and fair is what builds great relationships with your team.” — Mel Plett, Co-founder/Co-host, Your Work Friends

Don’t (necessarily) do things the way they’ve always been done: “Just because you’ve been handed a meeting schedule that your predecessor followed, don’t assume it represents the best use of your time. Don’t be afraid to change meeting protocols to fit the realities of what it really takes to deliver great results, and that also aligns with what it takes for you and your team to experience better work-life integration.” — Cheryl Haynes, Executive Coach

Advice on communication

Communicate clearly and often: “New managers often undervalue communication as a critical skill. Err on the side of over-communicating rather than under-communicating, and use clear, unambiguous language.” — Minette Norman, Founder and Principal, Minette Norman Consulting LLC

Don’t take credit more often than you give it: “When someone on your team does something great, there’s no need to tell others how involved you were. As a manager, you automatically win when your team members succeed. The coach of a football team never wins the game MVP, but still gets the credit for a winning season.” — Erika Migliaccio, Founder and Principal Consultant, Upstream HR Strategies 

Operate with clarity: “Ensure each individual is clear on their role, accountabilities, how to make decisions, and their personal goals. This helps to reduce friction and increase team confidence, efficiency, and effectiveness. The same goes for you!” — Lucy Kent, Solutions Director, Alchemist Learning and Development

Don’t forget to recognize and appreciate your team: “The research is incredibly strong that colleagues who feel recognized for their contributions at least weekly are significantly more engaged and productive at work. Systems can help here, too: A section of a weekly team meeting designated for teams to share appreciation for each other’s work in the last week, or a simple reminder for the manager themself to be sure they’re appreciating their team on the regular.” — Jessica Eastman Stewart, Author and Workshop Facilitator

Advice on leadership style 

Aim to be respected, rather than feared: “It’s not the 1800s anymore. You do not need to have your team fear you in order for them to respect and follow you. The best managers admit when they are wrong, are relatable, and understand when to be lax and when to be strict. This is how you gain respect – not by being the person everyone’s afraid of.” — Sammy Bohannon, Founder and Online Business Manager, Bohannon Virtual Solutions

Remember to stay human and authentic: “Celebrate wins (big or small), acknowledge personal achievements as a team, acknowledge challenges, and bring your own personality and empathy into how you lead. Remember to find channels for feedback to keep you always improving.” — Lucy Kent, Solutions Director, Alchemist Learning and Development

Don’t be too firm in your leadership style: “Don’t go into your management role with an unchanging attitude as far as your leadership style goes. People will often make the mistake of being too firm in their leadership style, trying to force their new team to adjust their ways and preferences to them. But the more effective leaders are the ones who see what their team needs from a leader and then cater their own style to provide that. You’ll avoid a lot of bumps along the way and earn more respect and trust from your team.” — Steve Schwab, CEO, Casago

Don’t neglect company culture: “New managers need to ensure they honor the organization’s culture in their decision-making. Corporate values offer an important guidepost, and supervisors should not only use them in their own decision-making, but draw their employees’ attention to them as well. Managers are the curators of culture. Through the stories they tell, the people they hold up as exemplars, and the efforts they make to build community, they can create supportive cultures that help employees thrive.” — Ann Skeet, Senior Director of Leadership Ethics, Markkula Center for Applied Ethics